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The Day The Penis Asked For A Raise

Nov 20, 2008 2:51 am Report Abuse

I know this isn't a poker-related blog (Like I ever post poker-related ones as is...lmao...) , but a friend of mine wrote this out and sent it to me. She told me I would get a good kick out of it and I did, so I had to of course share it with you fine people....lol....

The Day The Penis Asked For A Raise (Hahahahahahahahaha, a joke in the title itself)

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

  • I do physical labour.
  • I work at great depths.
  • I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
  • I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
  • I work in a damp environment.
  • I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
  • I work in high temperatures.
  • My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

Sincerely,

P. Niss


..::The Response::..


Dear Penis:


After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

  • You do not work 8 hours straight.
  • You fall asleep after brief work periods.
  • You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
  • You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
    You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
  • You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
  • You will retire well before you are 65.
  • You are unable to work double shifts.
  • You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.
    And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

Sincerely,

V. Gina



13 comments


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Totenbach Nov 20, 2008 2:56 am
Seen it before but still laughing
blacksnake50 Nov 20, 2008 3:09 am
Good arguement from both parties
MRred15219 Nov 20, 2008 3:21 am
now thats the best one yet
unicornsmith Nov 20, 2008 3:29 am
but did he get the raise????
Rob_Stunden Nov 20, 2008 3:31 am
No raise for him...V. Gina's raise states why...lol.
tahuneleader Nov 20, 2008 3:31 am
omg it is very funny. i think i will share this with my class
tahuneleader Nov 20, 2008 3:33 am

college class that is

tim4u Nov 20, 2008 3:38 am
well we know who is the boss huh,,,,,,,you could go on strike but believe this wil only cost you to be self employed with less enjoyable benifits
yanksfan11 Nov 20, 2008 3:40 am
lol very funny
pkrplr4116 Nov 20, 2008 3:40 am
OMG priceless!
melrob Nov 20, 2008 3:41 am

lmfao...i like this one...very funny

pkrplr4116 Nov 20, 2008 3:41 am
Oh, wait! Ms. V. Gina forgot one: Mr. P. Niss is totally useless after a few drinks, despite his protestations otherwise!
HalifaxLeafs Dec 11, 2008 12:12 am
havent seen that 1 in a while ..thnks 4 sharing buddy,,i can always use a laff

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