This guy wont lay no more bricks

AUSTRALIAN BRICKLAYER'S REPORT:
>
>This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the
>newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation
>Board.
>
>Supposedly, this is a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have received
>a Darwin Award for sure:
>
>Dear Sir:
>
>I am writing in response to your request for additional information In
>Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause
>of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the
>following details be sufficient.
>
>I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the acci dent, I was working
>alone on the roof of a new six-story building.
>
>When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over
>which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500lbs.
>
>Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a
>barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building
>on the sixth floor.
>
>Securing the rope at ground I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out
>and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope,
>holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
>
>You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh
>135lbs.
>
>Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my
>presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I
>proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.
>
>In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barre l, which was now
>proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed.
>
>This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken
>collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
>
>Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until
>the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.
>
>Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able
>to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience pain.
>
>At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the
>ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight
>of the bricks (that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs) I refer you
>again to my weight.
>
>As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the
>building.
>
>In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.
>
>This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several
>lacerations of my legs and lower body.
>
>Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel
>seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile
>of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
>
>I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in
>pain unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and
>let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its
>journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
>
>I hope this answers your inquiry.
>