KIDS WRITE ABOUT THE SEA

KIDS WRITE ABOUT THE SEA
The class was asked to write about the sea. I can just see
the teacher's expression when she read these........


1.) This is a picture of an octopus.. It has eight testicles. (Kelly
age 6)

2) Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6)

3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an island.. If you
don't have sea all round you, you are incontinent.. ( Wayne age 7)

4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
Richardson She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

5) A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its
head. (Billy age 8 )

6) My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back
with crabs. (Millie age 6)

7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds
to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the
sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would
have
been better off eating beans. (William age 7)

8) I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their
shiny tails. And how on earth do mermaids get pregnant? Like, really?
(Helen age 6)

9) I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother
is always screaming and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my
Mom, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to
write.
(Amy age 6)

10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric
eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea
where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher
age 7)

11) When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and
it makes my willy small. (Kevin age 6)

12) Divers have to be safe when they go under the water.
Two divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each
other. (Becky age 8)

13) On holidays my Mom went water skiing. She fell off
when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because
water fired right up her fat ass. (Jule age 7)

Start each day with a smile.... then pass it on!!!!!
When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt, then
call me over !