RESPECT
First lets estblish the simple knowledge of this word as defined in these 2 sources.
source 1
Respect
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Respect is one of the most (if not the most) important attributes for society to maintain, yet it is hard to define. On its broadest level respect is the acknowledgment that someone has value. They may be rich, work very hard, or may simply treat everyone in a way that gives them value. The importance on this value is that it changes peoples reactions towards you, usually in a positive way. A person is more likely to treat you nicely if you do what is asked of you instead of arguing with them. It is the value you earned while doing what you were told that has lead the person to respect you and therefore treat you nicely.
source 2
Dictionary
re·spect
–noun
1. a particular, detail, or point (usually prec. by in): to differ in some respect.
2. relation or reference: inquiries with respect to a route.
3. esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability: I have great respect for her judgment.
4. deference to a right, privilege, privileged position, or someone or something considered to have certain rights or privileges; proper acceptance or courtesy; acknowledgment: respect for a suspect's right to counsel; to show respect for the flag; respect for the elderly.
5. the condition of being esteemed or honored: to be held in respect.
6. respects, a formal expression or gesture of greeting, esteem, or friendship: Give my respects to your parents.
7. favor or partiality.
8. Archaic. a consideration.
–verb (used with object) 9. to hold in esteem or honor: I cannot respect a cheat.
10. to show regard or consideration for: to respect someone's rights.
11. to refrain from intruding upon or interfering with: to respect a person's privacy.
12. to relate or have reference to.
—Idioms13. in respect of, in reference to; in regard to; concerning.
14. in respect that, Archaic. because of; since.
15. pay one's respects, a. to visit in order to welcome, greet, etc.: We paid our respects to the new neighbors.
b. to express one's sympathy, esp. to survivors following a death: We paid our respects to the family.
16. with respect to, referring to; concerning: with respect to your latest request.
[Origin: 1300–50; (n.) ME (< OF) < L respectus action of looking back, consideration, regard, equiv. to respec-, var. s. of respicere to look back (re- re- + specere to look) + -tus suffix of v. action; (v.) < L respectus ptp. of respicere]
You can get respected in a field of endeavor by achievement but that is not the what I am talking about here. That is more recognition for a pursuit and although it is a great thing of itself, it is different than common respect.
Now we have something to work with, a basic knowledge of respect.
Most will tell you that knowledge is power, I will tell you that is a load of crap. Knowledge, in and of itself and at it's best is an unkept promise, a mear possibillity,a potential, at it's worst it's just cofusing words floating around in your head. KNOWLEDGE IS NOT POWER !!!!
APPLICATION of knowledge is power, for if you can't apply it, it is a waste of space in your head.
Now we have established the ground rules, and the point of this blog, practical application of respect.
Respect starts and ends with ourselves. I must respect myself, or at least some parts of myself in order to know how to apply it to others.
For instance,lets use an obvious example, Phil Hellmouth. I would venture to geuss he doesn't even respect his own rants. I remember a few years back when he took up meditation and probably got couseling from his wife in an attempt to curb his demeaning outbursts at the table when faced with a play that was, to his beliefs, less that optimum. That tells me that Phil understood that his rants were disrespectfull and he wanted to change that.He wanted to respect himself more so he attempted to change and give more respect or less disrespect. The fact that he was met with limited success is not the point.So, although Phil has to be respected for his talent, he still has a ways to go to be respected as a genleman. The fact that he wanted to improve himself and his respect of others or at the very least respect himself enough to not let those kinds of things get under his skin demonstrated a willingness to show more respect than he really believed was due. I will repeat that last part for emphasis... a willingness to show more respect than he really believed was due.
Why would someone try to show more respect to others than is due? Don't people have to earn respect? Therein lies the seeming dichotomy of respect.
The only people that you have to earn respect from are those that are unwilling to give it and therefore have to be shown respect first. Respect must be given to be received. It cannot be demonstrated that you have respect till you give it. So irregardless of how others behave it is always in ones own best interest to give respect and I am a unmovable believer in the simple fact that no one does anything that is not in their best interest. Some just don't know whats in their best interest. Even Mother Theresa and Ghandi were acting selfishly by giving so much of themselves. In their belief system they were striving to achieve what they wanted by their actions. They were giving in order to receive.
If you think people have to earn the right to be anywhere on this planet you are wrong. All of us won the only race we needed to win to justify our existence and anywhere we are in life when the sperm hit the egg. We all have the same rights after that moment and deserve the same respect from then on.
But what about those that have perpetrated atrocities on others or have acted disrespectfully and demeaningly ie. disrespectfully. Good question with a simple answer. Example, the greatest teaching tool fo all time. We must teach others by our example whether we feel they deserve it or not.
Why would I say nice hand when someone calls my huge raise when I am holding AA, with 8/4 suited pre-flop and the flop hits them. They made an obvious, so called , donk play, why give em any respect for such actions. Maybe I am not, maybe I am demonstrating respect for myself by giving respect or , at the least, not giving disrespect. I am teaching MYSELF. I have more respect for me than to allow a single moment to move me from my happy place. I have more respect for my abilites than to question my play and myself by disrespecting and allowing one hand to turn me into a whining , self righteous cry baby. It's not my job at this moment to try and teach them the error of that move, time and repitition will do that.You can't teach anyone anything till they are ready to learn and they must choose that moment, you can't decide it is now for them. However the one thing I can teach them and myself right now is respect, and in doing so showing respect for the game and the others at the table.Not that I always feel that way, sure I would like to give some people a peace of my mind for not respecting the play I made. But my beliefs are stronger than my feelings and I refuse to disrespect myself by acting less than I am capable of because of a feeling.
I am also a firm believer in treating people better than they treat themselves in the hopes that they will rise to meet it. Ever treated a downtrodden person with more compassion and respect than they are used to? They look at you like your a god and feel better about themselves than they did before because someone treated them like they were worthy just by experiencing a simple act of respect. You just became a hero by simply acting like a human being.
So, bite your toungue and say NH. If you can't leave a respectfull comment, leave none. If you want to feel better about yourself, help others feel better about themselves. Act as if you have more respect than you do and you will soon have the respect for yourself to give to others.
Of course there are those who have no respect for themselves and cannot give it, it's not their fault, they have just not learned yet what is in their best interest and should be treated with respect. Just because a child doesn't know better doesn't mean they should be treated poorly.
Consideration, honor, respect, if these sound like things you want than you better start giving them. If you do, I promise that you will experience levels of each that heretofore you could only imagine.
So easy to acquire with a little practice that barely requires belief to be ahcieved.
I can only demonstrate respect by having it and I can only have it by giving it.
2 rules for respect.
If you don't give any, there won't be any.
and my clan motto
Don't start none, won't be none.
And never has the golden rule applied more.
Peace and GL ..... sees ya on da felts
Bigpoppaboats
© Copyright 2008
24 comments
Thats is so true, you earn respect by your actions and how you represent yourself.
When you do or claim to do something that is wrong, you lose respect from many people and most important from yourself.
You may think that it is nothing, but self respect is a cancer that eats at the very core of someone's well being.
It makes people say and do things that they know is wrong. And what makes it worst is when you prey off the feelings of others to hide your own lack of self respect.
The best way to gain respect of others and yourself is to be true to both.
Be kind. Be polite. Be humble. THAT is respect.
Never gloat about your win. It will end up being your biggest loss.
Well written blog, poppa.
That is the best blog i have ever read. You are truelly a very wise man. There are few men that i respect and admire as much as my father. You are one of them. Those words of wisdom have touched me. Respect means everything to me. Teaching this to my son also means a lot to me. Thank you so much for this blog. This quote is really something. I used to pride myself on my knowledge. I never applied to anything as a young man though. That is the best advice you could ever give someont.
APPLICATION of knowledge is power, for if you can't apply it, it is a waste of space in your head
R Rely on yourself to be polite.
E Enjoy the power in losing
S Say only what makes you feel good
P Place others on the same platform as yourself
E Everyone is entitled to play any hand at any time
C Congatulate a winning hand no matter
T Thank those that congratulate you!!
The GOF.
Thank you so much for the blog Jodey. I read every sentence of it.. Very well said!
I am proud to say you are my friend. You are a very smart and RESPECTFUL man, and I love ya for it! ~ bebe
Excellent Blog ! IMHO,probably your best ever, not taking away from anything you published earlier ! You have my respect, as do many other Railbirds, as well !
.....Play on, respectfully....Tc....
I agree with most of what is said here except for this one line~~~A person is more likely to treat you nicely if you do what is asked of you instead of arguing with them.~~~I agree with what it says, but find it absurd that in order to gain someones respect u should do what they ask of u instead of arguing. If I find that in doing what is asked of me, to be against my own priciples and morals, I will damn well argue the point and stand up for what i believe in. I should be respected whether I go along with someones wishes or not.
Very nice blog Papa, ty for sharing
well said and very well thought out blog.
we at King Cartel live by our motto and we strongly believe in RESPECT.
Great blog Capo and i know for sure this will influence some major changes within some ppl on here.
I post a blog about respect 2 weeks ago.I am with you...Keep up and.....STRONG ENOUGH.
I agree with you bigword.
I have refrained from opining on so many blogs but this is such an intelligent, well thought-out and smartly stated blog, I just had to state my opinion. The comments left herein are very intelligent and based on logic as well.
I agree with Fuzz on the point that if you feel your values/morales are in question that undoubtedly you go with your gutt and your instinct, no matter who the person is at the other end of the line. Even if it means you disagree and possibly, even if you're wrong.
I use these following terms all the time in life. "Pick your battles." Make sure they're important enough to you to debate and fight if you have to. Make sure you know who you may be hurting too - is it worth it??????
AND "Agree to Disagree." Because you will disagree with people a whole lot in life.
Respect is about being TRUE to yourself because the moment you lose that, oy, you've entere a realm that becomes a life onto its own. Treat those the way you want to be treated. At the end of every day, you will answer to yourself.......... Hopefully you're okay with that.