Summary of Life
Jul 11, 2008 4:44 pm
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GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.
GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
SUCCESS:
At age 4 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . having a drivers licence.
At age 35 success is .. having money.
At age 50 success is . .. having money.
At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers licence.
At age 75 success is .. . having friends.
At age 80 success is .. . not piddling in your pants.
Take the time to live!!!
Life is too short. Dance naked
© Copyright 2008
13 comments
Haha!! Very true..........
especially these two!! (I am one of 5 kids, 4 of us are girls)
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
im 37 and u made me piss my pants now where do i fit in
lmao this is a great blog....and the mum brushing your hair thing is so true...epsecially if it's long and she is gonna put it up in a pony tail..lmao
thanks for sharing this...have a great day
OMG.....I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE THIS BLOG. THANKS SOOOOOOOOO MUCH FOR SHARING TWINKS.
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND. GL ON AND OFF THE FELTS
ROFL-------THESE ARE SO TRUE AND SO FUNNY
THANKS
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH
Loved it
..Thanks for posting it..my fav. The second one always gets caught..soooo true..I got in so much trouble til I fuigured that one out
~Flops~